Thursday, 29 November 2012

The Bachelor Canada Recap of Episode 9 After the Final Rose OR It Must Really Suck to be You, Whitney!

I really hope no one was fooled by that preview where Tyler asks if there are wedding bells in Bianka and Brad's future...and then they show Bianka shaking her head no. Then the audience gasps in amazement. That was the worst bit of editing since, ah, well, last week with Whitney and Brad's sister Ashley. Did they really think that would make us watch the show? You had to be living in a cave in the Badlands to not have seen or heard of the spread Hello Magazine had out on the stands last Thursday....everyone knew they almost eloped right after filming ended.

Did we even need the "After the Final Rose" episode at all? We've seen B & B gushing over each other for 7 days now. And I'm pretty sure that Whitney is still a whack job. Plus this episode is always the same format. Always. Oh wait,...unless the Bachelor is Jason Mesnick. I could have written this seven days ago, and it would have gone something like this:


Tyler comes out and does a little spiel about Canada's first Bachelor and his heartwarming proposal to Bianka Kamber. Then he asks us "Are they still together or have things suddenly changed?" What? Since last Thursday morning when they were on Breakfast Television? Oh noooo! Not Brad and Bianka. Not the darlings of Canada. Say it isn't so.  It's okay, because Brad comes out and reassures us that they are still together,,,"week by week, it gets better and better". He also says "its very liberating now that everyone knows" he picked Bianka. 

Brad goes and hides backstage when Tyler brings out Whitney. Good call.  He probably figured Tyler will calm her down before he has to talk to her. Or at the very least, get that forehead vein to stop doing that throbbing thing. Eeck. Well Tyler tried. He was doing pretty well, but then he asked her how she's been doing. Here we go, everyone hold on. "Everyone has been saying unkind things,.like about my eyebrows and this vein on my head". Oh oh, that thing might pop or something. Then she says she knew that Brad wasn't the guy for her, ever since their date in Pentiction. She stayed on the show, she says, because she felt "pressured". Brad must have felt like it was safe to come back out, so they play that breakup clip where she hides in the bathroom so she doesn't have to hear "hurtful things" from Brad. Like we all needed to watch that train wreck again.

Brad asks her, "So Penticton was in the 4th week, we still had 5 weeks to go, why didn't you leave?" The reply from Whitney is "Waa, waa, you could have sent me home, waa, waa". By the way, the term "waa, waa" refers to that fake TV cry that only needs a folded over Kleenex tissue to magically blot up a tear, and not ruin your makeup. With that, Tyler does in fact, send Whitney home.

Then, Bianka makes her grand entrance. After alot of gushing and drooling over each other, They tell us about their "journey". She had her reservations about the show and she made sense when she explained why she played coy or hard to get with Brad. She put herself in his shoes and realized that she would pretty much know by first impressions if there was an attraction. She wasn't going to be fake and gush all over him, and monopolize all his time. The turning point was in Mexico. When she flew back to Vancouver after, it dawned on her she had a bit of a crush going on.

They played the journey montage, again, and Brad said the most awkward thing about doing the show was the kissing. He acted out a kissing scene, which was a bit off-putting, and mocked himself asking the producer, "Was that okay, or did it look like I was trying to resuscitate her?" Such a funny guy, that Brad Smith. The show ended with Tyler asking them if wedding bells were in their future. There was none of that Bianca shaking her head to deny, or the audience gasping in astonishment. OMG, they fooled us! They totally tricked us! Of course, Brad told us again, that the two of them took a ten day vacation right after the filming ended, and they almost eloped! He's been saying the same thing a lot. Like to Hello! Magazine or Breakfast Television. Hey wait...he didn't really answer the fricking question now, did he? Hmmmmm......... 

So, will there be a Bachelorette Canada? Well, first of all, there isn't much of a point in having JUST a Bachelor, right? It's the next logical step. Last night, Tyler Harcott put out a couple of interesting, maybe suggestive tweets. If you read between the lines. Really hard. With-a-magnifying-glass hard.  Who would it be? Well, you can be pretty sure it won't be Whitney. I think it's pretty obvious that the producers want it to turn out well. Just as ooey-gooey as Brad and Bianka. Not unless she gets some therapy and cleans up her image. Not unless Kara turns the gig down. Not unless Chantelle stays a virgin. Not unless Laura B still lacks self-confidence. It must really suck to be Whitney. It's just not going to happen. I think they would turn to Kara Henderson first. If it's going to happen, they will make the announcement soon, to keep the momentum going. They first announced the Bachelor Canada last January and started filming in May - and this seems like a good schedule to keep to, at least in Canada.

Upcoming events are: the Ashley and J.P. wedding in mid-December, The Bachelor Season 17 with Sean Lowe in January; and the first season of Big Brother Canada in February.

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